Friday, 17 June 2011

Story: Few short stories

Some time ago, a man punished his 3-year-old daughter for wasting a roll of gold wrapping paper. Money was tight and he became infuriated when the child tried to decorate a box to put under the Christmas tree.
Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift to her father the next morning and said, “This is for you, Daddy.” He was embarrassed by his earlier overreaction, but his anger flared again when he found the box was empty.
He yelled at her, “Don’t you know that when you give someone a present, there’s supposed to be something inside it?”
The little girl looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said,”Oh, Daddy, it is not empty. I blew kisses into the box. All for you, Daddy.”

The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little girl, and he begged for her forgiveness.
It is told that the man kept that gold box by his bed for years and whenever he was discouraged, he would take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love of the child who had put it there.
In a very real sense, each of us as humans have been given a gold container filled with unconditional love and kisses from our children, friends, family and God. There is no more precious possession anyone could hold.


*http://academictips.org/blogs/moral-tale-helpless-love/

Hopeless Love:
Once upon a time all feelings and emotions went to a coastal island for a vacation. According to their nature, each was having a good time. Suddenly, a warning of an impending storm was announced and everyone was advised to evacuate the island.

The announcement caused sudden panic. All rushed to their boats. Even damaged boats were quickly repaired and commissioned for duty.
Yet, Love did not wish to flee quickly. There was so much to do. But as the clouds darkened, Love realised it was time to leave. Alas, there were no boats to spare. Love looked around with hope.

Just then Prosperity passed by in a luxurious boat. Love shouted, “Prosperity, could you please take me in your boat?”
“No,” replied Prosperity, “my boat is full of precious possessions, gold and silver. There is no place for you.”

A little later Vanity came by in a beautiful boat. Again Love shouted, “Could you help me, Vanity? I am stranded and need a lift. Please take me with you.” Vanity responded haughtily, “No, I cannot take you with me. My boat will get soiled with your muddy feet.”
Sorrow passed by after some time. Again, Love asked for help. But it was to no avail. “No, I cannot take you with me. I am so sad. I want to be by myself.”

When Happiness passed by a few minutes later, Love again called for help. But Happiness was so happy that it did not look around, hardly concerned about anyone.

Love was growing restless and dejected. Just then somebody called out, “Come Love, I will take you with me.” Love did not know who was being so magnanimous, but jumped on to the boat, greatly relieved that she would reach a safe place. On getting off the boat, Love met Knowledge. Puzzled, Love inquired, “Knowledge, do you know who so generously gave me a lift just when no one else wished to help?” Knowledge smiled, “Oh, that was Time.” “And why would Time stop to pick me and take me to safety?” Love wondered.

Knowledge smiled with deep wisdom and replied, “Because only Time knows your true greatness and what you are capable of. Only Love can bring peace and great happiness in this world.”

The important message is that when we are prosperous, we overlook love. When we feel important, we forget love. Even in happiness and sorrow we forget love. Only with time do we realize the importance of love. Why wait that long? Why not make love a part of your life today?”


The important things in your life:
A philosophy professor stood before his class with some items on the table in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks, about 2 inches in diameter.
He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous “Yes.”

“Now,” said the professor, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The rocks are the important things – your family, your partner, your health, your children – things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter – like your job, your house, your car.
The sand is everything else. The small stuff.

“If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued “there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life.
If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal.
Take care of the rocks first – the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.”


Color of Friendship:


Once upon a time the colors of the world started to quarrel: all claimed that they were the best, the most important, the most useful, the favorite.
GREEN said: “Clearly I am the most important. I am the sign of life and of hope. I was chosen for grass, trees, leaves - without me, all animals would die. Look over the countryside and you will see that I am in the majority.”

BLUE interrupted: “You only think about the earth, but consider the sky and the sea. It is the water that is the basis of life and, drawn up by the clouds, forms the deep sea. The sky gives space and peace and serenity. Without my peace, you would all be nothing.”

YELLOW chuckled: “You are all so serious. I bring laughter, gaiety, and warmth into the world. The sun is yellow, the moon is yellow, the stars are yellow. Every time you look at a sunflower, the whole world starts to smile. Without me there would be no fun.”

ORANGE started next to blow her trumpet: “I am the color of health and strength. I may be scarce, but I am precious for I serve the needs of human life. I carry the most important vitamins. Think of carrots, pumpkins, oranges, mangoes, and pawpaws. I don’t hang around all the time, but when I fill the sky at sunrise or sunset, my beauty is so striking that no one gives another thought to any of you.”

RED could stand it no longer. He shouted out: “I am the ruler of all of you - I am blood - life’s blood! I am the color of danger and of bravery. I am willing to fight for a cause. I bring fire into the blood. Without me, the earth would be empty as the moon. I am the color of passion and of love, the red rose, the poinsettia and the poppy.”

PURPLE rose up to his full height. He was very tall and spoke with great pomp: “I am the color of royalty and power. Kings, chiefs, and bishops have always chosen me for I am the sign of authority and wisdom. People do not question me - they listen and obey.”

Finally, INDIGO spoke, much more quietly than all the others, but with just as much determination: “Think of me. I am the color of silence. You hardly notice me, but without me you all become superficial. I represent thought and reflection, twilight and deep water. You need me for balance and contrast, for prayer and inner peace.”

And so the colors went on boasting, each convinced of his or her own superiority. Their quarreling became louder and louder. Suddenly there was a startling flash of bright lightening - thunder rolled and boomed. Rain started to pour down relentlessly. The colors crouched down in fear, drawing close to one another for comfort.

In the midst of the clamor, rain began to speak: ” You foolish colors, fighting amongst yourselves, each trying to dominate the rest. Don’t you know that you were each made for a special purpose, unique and different? Join hands with one another and come to me.”
Doing as they were told, the colors united and joined hands. The rain continued: “From now on, when it rains, each of you will stretch across the sky in a great bow of color as a reminder that you can all live in peace. The RAINBOW is a sign of hope for tomorrow.”
And so, whenever a good rain washes the world, and a rainbow appears in the sky, let us remember to appreciate one another.

Wednesday, 8 June 2011

Jokes: Few jokes


Jokes:


*মেডিকেল টিচার্ঃ কেউ অজ্ঞান হয়ে গেলে প্রথমে তার ঠোটে মুখ লাগিয়ে তার ফুসফুস এ বাতাস (অক্সিজেন্) দিবা 


এবং তার বুক "press" করতে থাকবা, বুঝেছো?

এটা নিয়ে কোনো প্রশ্ন থাকলে করতী পারো?

বল্টুঃ জি স্যার , আচ্ছা স্যার মেয়েদের কে কিভাবে অজ্ঞান করা যায় একটু শিখায় দিবেন্? :p





Jokes:


কিস কি?

জ্যামিতি অনুসারে..

“কিস হচ্ছে দুইটা ঠোঁট এর ন্যূনতম দূরত্ব!!”

ইকনমিক্সঃ

“কিস হচ্ছে এমন একটা জিনিশ যার চাহিদা সব সময় যোগান অপেক্ষা বেশি থাকে”


পদার্থঃ

“এটা হচ্ছে মানবদেহকে চার্জ করার পদ্ধতি”

কম্পিউটারঃ

“ দুইটা দেহ এক টা আরেকটা এর সাথে সংযুক্ত! থাকে কোন ডাটা ক্যাবল ছাড়াই!!”





Jokes:


আগে…

ভালবাসা শুরু হইত দৃষ্টি বিনিময়ের মাধ্যমে…চলতে থাকত উপহার বিনিময়ের মাধ্যমে…শেষ হইত অশ্রু বিসর্জনের 



মাধ্যমে… :’(


আর এখন ??


ভালবাসা শুরু হয় friend request-এর মাধ্যমে…চলতে থাকে Pokes,Likes,Comments,Tags & Messages -


এর মাধ্যমে…শেষ হয় offline হয়ে যাওয়া তারপর friend list থেকে remove করে দেওয়া…অতঃপর…blocked!:-






প্রেমিকা তার প্রেমিককে রাতে রোমান্টিক মেসেজ পাঠাচ্ছে!!


মেয়েঃ ঘুমিয়ে আছো তো স্বপ্ন পাঠাও, জেগে আছো তো ভাবনা পাঠাও,যদি 


কাঁদছো তো চোখের জল 


পাঠাও..।।

ছেলেঃ প্রিয়তমা Toilet করতেছি...কি পাঠাবো ?????? :-P



The Changes about Our Generation

1970's : Love me, but don't touch me.


1980's : Touch me, but don't kiss me.


1990's : Kiss me, but don't do anything more.


2000's : Do anything, but don't tell anyone.


Since 2011 : Do everything, otherwise I will tell everyone that you can't do anything . Asola 


feel, love bolta akhon r kisue ney ................ Amar Dada amaka bolto Agar kalar Valobasha 


onak Pobitro cilo ...........................




Girl: mom,can i go for a walk for some fresh air...???
Mom: yes sure.But ask ur "fresh air" to drop you home before 9:00 pm 



***Two bachelors were talking about their respective choice of life partner. One friend said,'It is generally said that people with opposite characteristics make the happiest marriages. What is your opinion ?
The friend replied,'Yes, they are right. That is why I am looking for a girl with a money!'

***A fellow was very much in love with a beautiful girl. One day she told him that the next day was her birthday. He told her he would send her a bouquet of roses... one for each year of her life.
That evening he called the local florist and ordered twenty-one roses with instructions that they be delivered first thing the next morning.
As the florist was preparing the order, he decided that since the young man was such a good customer, he would put an extra dozen roses in the bouquet.
The fellow never did find out what made the young girl so angry with him.

***
After she woke up, a woman told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's day. What do you think it means?" 
"You'll know tonight." he said. 
That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it - to find a book entitled "The Meaning of Dreams" 

***
ম্যাডাম সাহিত্যের ক্লাসে টেস্ট নিতে গিয়ে ছাত্রদের বললেন, “তোমরা এমন একটা ছোট গল্প লেখ, যাতে একই সংগে রহস্য, যৌনতা, রাজকীয়তা, ধর্মীয় আবেশ সবই থাকে। সময় ২০ মিনিট।”

২ মিনিট যেতে না যেতেই একজন হাত তুলে বললো, “ম্যাডাম আমার শেষ”। এত কম সময়ে শেষ দেখে ম্যাডাম তো রীতিমত অবাক।

ম্যাডাম: “যে চারটা বিষয় বলেছিলাম তার সবগুলো তোমার গল্পে আছে তো?”
ছাত্র: “জ্বী ম্যাডাম।”
ম্যাডাম: “তোমার গল্প পড়ে শোনাও দেখি।”
ছাত্র: “ওহ আল্লাহ, রাজকুমারী আবার প্রেগন্যান্ট! কে করলো আকামটা!!! ” 

***
"POOR BOYS!"
 When a Girl Cries ------------ The World "Consoles" her
 But when a boy cries ---------- They say Come on man don't be A "Girl"
 If A Girl slaps a Boy ----------- Definitely the Boy would have "done something"
 If Boy Slaps a girl ------------ -- Rascal doesn't know how to "Respect Ladies"

 If a Girl is talking to Boys ----- She is "Very Friendly"
 If a Boy talks to a Girl ---------- He is "flirting"

***
MUTHU & TOURIST
One tourist from U.S.A.asked to Muthu whether any great man born in this
village or not .. and Muthu said .. "No sir, only babies were born
here."

***
Dear Tech Support
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 .  thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance . Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2 . I recommend Flowers 2.1 andDiamonds 5.0 ! 

In case Wife 1.0 using loads of resources and giving you headache the best course of action is to enter the command C:\ APOLOGIZE and the system will return to normal anyway.

Under any circumstances, do not install Sexy Colleague with short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the host pc. I  can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 .. Please help!!!

***
প্রেমিকাঃ তুমি কি আমায় ভালোবাস
?
প্রেমিকঃ বিশ্বাস না হলে পরীক্ষা করো প্রেমিকাঃ ধরো তোমার সার্টের পকেটে মাত্র বিশ টাকা আছে, তা থেকে আমি পনের টাকা চাইলাম, তুমি দিতে পারবে?

জরুরি টাকাটায় প্রেমিকা চোখ পরেছে দেখে, বিব্রত প্রেমিক নিজেকে সামলে নিয়ে বললো, কেনো পারবো না,একশবার পারবো | তবে পরীক্ষা তারিখটা একটু পিছানো যায় না |

***একলোক এক ট্রাফিক মহিলাকে বিয়ে করল | বাসর রাতের পরদিন ট্রাফিক মহিলা ১০০০ টাকা জরিমানা করলএভাবে

-ওভার স্পীড ৩০০
- ৩০০পরানাহেলমেট
- ৪০০এট্রিওয়েরং

***
লিঙ্গ সমস্যা:
একবার সরকারের নীতি নির্ধারকদের একটি দল জটিল সমস্যায় পড়লেন।সমস্যাটা লিঙ্গ নির্ধারন সংক্রান্ত।
তো তারা গেলেন খালেদা জিয়ার কাছে।ম্যাডাম, কাঠাল কোন লিঙ্গ ? ম্যাডাম বললেন, এটা নির্ধারন করা কোনো সমস্যা না।আমি আজকেই বাংলা একাডেমীর ডিজিকে বলে দিচ্ছি তিনি জানিয়ে দিবেন।
কিন্তু দুইদিন গেল, ডিজি জানালেন না।তখন তারা গেল এরশাদের কাছে।এরশাদের ঝটপট জবাব-আরে কাঠাল হল পুং লিঙ্গ।কারণ কাঠালের বিচি আছে।

এরপর পত্রিকার খবর বের হল-পুলিশ একদল ছাত্রকে ডান্ডা দিয়ে বেধড়ক পেটাচ্ছে।
আচ্ছা, পুলিশ কোন লিঙ্গ ? জানতে চাওয়া হল প্রধানমন্ত্রী খালেদা জিয়ার কাছে।খালেদা বললেন, এটা স্বরাষ্ট্র মন্ত্রণালয়ে খোঁজ নিতে হবে।সেই খোঁজ আর আসে না দেখে এরশাদের কাছে জানতে চাওয়া হয়।তিনি বললেন যেহেতু পুলিশের ডান্ডা আছে তাই পুলিশ পুংলিঙ্গ।
এরপর প্রশ্ন উঠে আইন কোন লিঙ্গ।এবারও যথারীতি খালেদা জিয়া ফেলটুস।বলতে পারলেন না।অগত্যা আবার কাবিল এরশাদের কাছে জিজ্ঞাসা।তিনি ভেবেচিন্তে বললেন, আইনের ফাঁক আছে, তাই আইন স্ত্রী লিঙ্গ।

***Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller? Tommy: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.

***
Onekdin age USA te biraler dowr protigugita hoisilo. Jothariti Bangladesher 1 biral o ongsogrohon korsilo. Khela sheshe dekha gelo Bangladesher biral first...hoise. Sangbadikra biral ke jiggas korlo eto unnoto desher biral thakte gorib, pusti bonchito 1ta desher biral hoye kivabe first holen? Amader biral saheb uttor dilen: ''Asole ami biral na, Royal Bengal
Tiger. But opustite vugte vugte ekhon amake biraler moto dekha jay"


***


Cool Math Trick
Filed Under Funny Tricks | 33 Comments
This math trick is really cool. Just try it!

1. Grab a calculator (You won’t be able to do this one in your head)
2. Key in the first three digits of your phone number (NOT the area code-if your number is 01-123-4567, the 1st 3 digits are 123)
3. Multiply by 80
4. Add 1
5. Multiply by 250
6. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number
7. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number again
8. Subtract 250
9. Divide number by 2
Do you recognize the answer?
Amazing Trick
Filed Under Funny Tricks | 2 Comments

x= first 3 digits of phone number
y= last 4 digits

=[250(80x+1) + (2y - 250)] / 2
=[20000x + 250 + 2y - 250] / 2
=[20000x + 2y] / 2
= 10000x + y
= your phone number 



স্যার : তুমি বড় হয়ে কি করবে ?
ছাত্র : বিয়ে
স্যার : আমি বুঝাতে চাচ্ছি বড় হয়ে তুমি কি হবে ?
ছাত্র : জামাই
স্যার : আরে আমি বলতে চাচ্ছি তুমি বড় হয়ে কি পেতে চাও ?
...ছাত্র : বউ
স্যার : গাধা,তুমি বড় হয়ে মা বাবার জন্য কি করবে?
ছাত্র : বউ নিয়ে আসবো
স্যার : গর্দভ,তোমার বাবা মা তোমার কাছে কি চায় ?
ছাত্র : নাতী নাতনী
স্যার : ইয়া খোদা...তোমার জীবনের লক্ষ্য কি ?
ছাত্র : বিয়ে
স্যার অজ্ঞান...

Love & Feelings


‎Love:

"Love" is a visiting card.
"Life" is a credit card.
"Wife" is a visa card.
"Lover" is a atm card.
But "friendship" is a life time SIM card. . .!!

Funny:

Dream makes everything possible,
Hope makes everything work,
Love makes everything beautiful,
Smile makes all the above….......

So always Brush your Teeth…………….

Chondo:
Tiyar moto dustu tumi
Fuler moto misti
tumi amy dao na keno
tomar thoter kisti

Girl top 10 false.1. I miss you.
2. I do not teel false.
3. I am talking with a boy first time.
4. I am talking with my cousin.
...5. I fell shy to talk with you freely.
6. I do not belive in love.
7. I am not like other girls.
8. I do not know anything.
9. All boys are same.
10. You are the last and the first boy in my life and i can not live without you... Lol xD

What is pure love & how do you know if your love is pure?
True, pure and crystal love is unconditional, seeking perfection. It means that you would suffer rather than to make suffer. Those who love in the purest way may often look crazy in our eyes, the sinners. To love, in the simplest meaning, is not to give pleasure to someone or to be jealous about him/her, it is about thinking about their good, and never hesitating between their and your own good. You would sometimes refuse to give them physical or even moral pleasures to avoid them bad consequences, even if they get mad at you. You won't get jealous of your beloved or friend when they enjoy time with someone else, but when someone wants to hurt them in th back. Love has NO LIMITS and NO BOUNDARIES! Love is blind to reason! Love is for EVERYBODY, open-minded people love EVERYBODY, even their enemies. Love is UNIVERSAL, for all faiths, races, genders, nations, etc. Love comes from God. God is love.

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. " - 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

13:6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
13:7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
13:8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. (NIV)

Source(s):
Eastern Orthodox Christian

Manus keno onnoke valobashe?
Manus tar moner manus ke joi korte chai. Onnoke joi korar basona and pabar anondo onek besi.

Manus keno onner kase valobasha chai?
Manus chai se jerokom thik tar jonno-e onno keo taake assess koruk.

Manus keno valobasha na pele kosto pai?
Karon se tokhon mone kore keo tar mullayun kore nai. so he start hate himself. because he thinks he is not useful in this society.


GIRL LANGUAGE 
-> if i dont text you : 
( its because im waiting for you to text me .. ) 
-> when i walk away from you mad : 
( follow me ) 
-> when i push or hit you : 
( grab me @ dont let go ) 
-> when im quiet : 
( ask me what"s wrong.. ) 
-> when i ignore you : 
( give me your attention .. ) 
-> when you see me crying : 
( wipe my tears w/ a tissue )